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If your boyfriend asked you to wear lingerie he picked out, would you?

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Look: this is totally up to you. Not everyone would be very comfortable putting on a costume for sex and that’s basically what this is. It’s not even really my thing, but if my lover told me there was something I could do that would really rev their engine, then I’d do it.

Good sex is a team effort. You have to communicate what you want and need. You have to be willing to give a little to get a lot. And putting on a fancy little outfit that I know is going to be taken off pretty quickly is all I have to do to get laid good, then I am totally down for that.

And if it turns out that he REALLY digs it, then I’d probably go out and buy some more lingerie on my own just to keep him on his toes.

EDIT: I was reading through some of the other answers and many women mention that they would not be comfortable in lingerie that is particularly trashy. I don’t really share this concern for two reasons

  1. There are times when that is exactly the role I want to play in sex. I want my partner to objectify me and take his pleasure from me and I trust that pleasing me is part of what will please him in the process. I’m not always in that mood, of course, but in those cases, I wouldn’t wear the very slutty lingerie.
  2. I don’t have much of a problem communicating my wants and desires in sex and it’s pretty obvious when they aren’t being met.

Both of these reasons may be the result of the fact that I’m a man. Even though I have sex with men, I do share a lot of the male sexual perspective.

I think this does highlight an important point that I didn’t emphasize enough earlier: you have to be comfortable and turned on by the situation as well.

I never considered the idea that someone might do something that they think is a turn-off in order to turn on their partner. Don’t do that! Again, sex is a team effort. It’s one thing to do something that just doesn’t do anything for you. It’s quite another to do something that you think is disgusting and works against your arousal. You have to turn each other on and you should both enjoy the experience.

If you don’t care for the lingerie and don’t feel comfortable wearing it, talk to your boyfriend. Ask him why he thinks it turns him on. It’s possible that he just wanted to see what it was like and it’s actually not a big deal for him. Maybe you could purchase lingerie together so that you can show him what you would be comfortable wearing and he can tell you what he thinks is sexy about it.

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